In this post I am sharing a powerful tool that came out of a mindfulness movement about 20 years ago. We all feel overwhelmed at times as we move through phases of our lives. RAIN is a techniques you can use to move through periods of stress, loss, anxiety and anger. It simply stands for recognise, allow, investigate and natural loving awareness
R for Recognise
First recognise what's going on. Sometimes when we are in a a difficult situation, we often have the opposite reaction. Like when we want someone to help us we can push them away, even sometimes denying the situation. So, we just 'name it to tame it'. Name it.. what's going on? What are you feeling, what are you thinking?
By naming what you are thinking or feeling, you open a doorway to seeing clearly what's going on.
In Shamanism its called' seeing the dragon' meaning you cant fight an enemy if you cant see it. So essentially you are becoming conscious to what previously you were unaware of. In essence you are becoming more aware of your thoughts. For example, I'm busy doing some work on my laptop that needs full concentration and my kids are playing in the same room. I can feel the wave of frustration and instead of react, I pause and recognise what I'm feeling. And instead bursting with emotion I ride the wave out with the help of RAIN. This process of recognising the feeling brings us closer to the moment of what's really happening. And instead of losing it, I notice what happens to my body, my jaw and wait for it to lift.
A for Allow
Allow what's arising in you to just be, don't push it away and don't try to resist it. Give it space to breathe, to express itself. You are pausing in the midst of your crisis to give space to what is happening right now. Taking time for your thoughts, feelings, emotions and physical sensations because most of the time we push, stop, deny or bury what's really there. When we resist these typed of moments we give it more power, feeding it the energy it requires to stay there. Even when its really difficult acknowledge it ' Im feeling angry because ..... and then say 'let go, let be' which helps you evolve into a new consciousness of awareness. You are shifting from the limbic part of the brain to the prefrontal cortex.
Every thought, emotion, feeling and sensation has a beginning, middle and end and none of its permanent. The more space you give it, the more you develop a greater understanding and wisdom that you are not that emotion, fear, anger or sensation. Almost like weather moving across your sky of awareness.
I for Investigate
The first 2 steps are game changers but when dealing with I in very difficult emotions, it will take you even deeper into the experience. In the recognise phase, we asked or could ask what's happening inside of me? What's present right now? With the investigate phase we inquire and peel the layers back and ask.
What most needs my attention right now?
How am I experiencing what's coming up for me?
What's happening in my body?
What's the narrative I'm telling my self?
For example you can be in a situation where you notice an intense emotion like anger or rage coming up and as you recognise it, you allow it to be there and realise what's under the anger. Initially its anger but as you peel away by asking questions you discover underneath the anger is hurt or fear.
You ask the investigate questions like you would a friend or a child, with kindness and compassion and, with a huge amount of tenderness. Its at this moment you may experience the big release which may be a flood of tears that moves you to the way out. You can place a hand on your heart at this moment or intuitively wherever feels right. You can say ' you are ok, I love you, Im listening'. This is how you meet the pain with compassion.
N for Natural Loving Awareness
This phase is the disentanglement of all the other challenging experiences and creates freedom and space to heal, transform and ultimately begin to move beyond the small self of fear, stress and into natural loving awareness. Its the desert of a 5 course meal and, a liberating homecoming to your true self. In this final stage there is no where to go. There's nothing to do. We simply allow ourselves to just be. And that is powerful.